Yesterday was a challenging day for me.
I went to bed mad, upset, sad on Monday night and Tuesday woke up the same.
My life balance is a struggle.
Some days I feel like I really have it all together and others I feel like I just plain can't figure it all out.
I put a lot of pressure on myself personally and professionally.
I want to be a great Mom. I want Mia to know that I did everything I could to make sure she was cared for and at the end of each and every single day never questioned whether or not I loved her.
I want her to hear it every single day and multiple times at that.
Pressure weighs heavy on my heart. Very heavy.
I'm not one to relax often. I live a life on the go. Always.
Motherhood is no joke.
And some days...
I just feel like a shitty Mom.
I work 8+ hours a day and am often gone before Mia is up.
I work out 3-4 times a weeks, so that means I see her for about an hour or two, if I'm lucky, on those days.
My struggles have been weakening my ability to stay strong.
Yesterday about broke me.
It was one of those days where I was on the verge of tears for most of it and I just wasn't sure I would make it through without totally collapsing emotionally and physically.
I feel better today.
But I'm not afraid to admit that some days are tougher then others.
I'm not perfect.
I will never claim to be.
I know at the end of the day, all of my sacrifices are worth it to make a better life for Mia.
After all, she is all that matters.
The love I hold in my heart for that little girl is not something I need to justify or explain to anyone.
She knows it and I know it and to me that's all that counts.